Swish: temperature (10); spiciness (9); burstage abatement (9); size (8); tortilla (8)
Shrug: rice (6); beans (6); sauciness (6); ingredient mix (6)
Clang: meat (5); vegetables (3); cheese (1)
Intangibility bonus: 1 (of 2)

Usually, when you ask the resident slabmaker what the best meat is that day, you expect a savvy recommendation. So imagine our considerable consternation when the fellow inside the Tacos Santana truck suggested the al pastor, and it turned out to be a bust – a little too fatty, a lot too flavor-deficient. Sauce issues here ran rampant, as the pastor-baste combined with multiple salsas (roja and verde) to create a thick, pepper-dashed, chipotle-ish concoction that did its best to obliterate everything in its path. The tiny-grained rice and pale refried beans were equally lackluster, and the ingredient mix leaned heavily on its dominant meat/sauce axis. We were happy with the lengthy sizing...much happier than we were with the paltry vegetable participation (nothing more than hearty onion slices) and, more than anything, the we’re-pretty-sure-it-wasn’t-even-there cheese, which earned one gift mustache in the unlikely event that a pinch of it actually made it into the politely grilled tortilla. At least burstage abatement performed reliably – had it not, we’d have had a serious mess on our hands, and in our laps. Infernal spice doesn’t mean much to us when a burrito’s final bite is just plain off, as was the case here. Bummer.

Swish: sauciness (10); spiciness (10); size (9); ingredient mix (9); temperature (9); tortilla (8); meat (8); beans (8); burstage abatement (8)
Shrug: rice (7); cheese (7); vegetables (7)
Clang: no elements clanged
Intangibility bonus: 2 (of 2)

Delicious, sizable, and spicy as all get-out. The rich salsa verde that hallmarked this slab had us thinking they’d slyly imported our lunch from Tacos El Tonayense behind our backs...but no, this was their own extraordinary sauce, and the all-inclusive ingredient mix ensured that it would enhance each bite with combustible tomatillo flavor. Well-peppered, grilled-to-order chicken made a regular appearance, and while the refried beans took on an oddly pale shade, they accented the whole presentation nicely. The small-grain rice was a bit perplexing, and cheese never played a major role, merely blending in where it could. Supreme length was a welcome sight, although some occasional floppiness pointed straight to a wrap that should have been tighter. Meanwhile, a pico de gallo-less vegetable grouping was thankfully propped up by a heaping helping of grilled, chopped onion. The fine grilled tortilla looked more outstanding than it really was, and we could have done with a few less folds in the wrap. Still, our intangi-meter was bing-bing-bing’ing like crazy throughout, and there’s a lot of value in that.

An El Balazo-esque beanpole-burrito with a slender figure – tall and trim, indeed. Perpetual sauciness smothered all 17 bites in strong – but hardly tongue-shattering – spice, yet the whole thing was an exercise in wondering how the cheese disappeared. (We saw him add it, we swear we did.) The pinto beans (refrieds were sadly unavailable) possessed a mildly awkward aftertaste, and no singular veggies outstood, although the thin guacamole nevertheless contributed to the saucy shuffle. Steak was fine, although some gristly moments brought its rating down a notch. Quite a segregated ingredient mix. Very nicely grilled tortilla. Hot from top to bottom. Faultless construction. Almost great, but merely good.